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December 24, 2004
visions of sugar-shrums will dance in your head
Christmas is a red state holiday.
And let's be honest, for VRWC card carrying members, the last few months have been Christmas every day.
But now it's official so I am going all out this year on the Christmas, Bible thumping stuff, and what the left thinks of as nativity obscenities.
Red. red. red. RED.
Jesusland baby. Jesusland.
Oh and I love our military.
In fact, please note that baby Jesus is staying at MY compound this holiday season. There is room at this inn. Abort that, libshit.
Sure I'm an atheist, but it irritates my unwashed Kerry voting alimony paying neighbors to the point of Moxtopian orgasmic yet holy ROI. Donald Trump would build a skyscraper here on Melrose Place if he was aware of the political capital I have built up.
You need evidence on how Xmas was tailor-made for those of us in Jesusland? Just look at the Jesus-hating homeless intellectual on your left. Try not to throw rocks at him.
Then look to your right.
- We chop down *gasp* healthy pines to put in our livingrooms. I found a stinky liberal lurking in mine, he called himself Shaksukack and dances with buterflies. I call him dingdong and he now cleans my cat's litterbox with his tongue. For food stamps.
We string these "murdered" pine trees with lights (hello big electric companies) and adorn them with tacky ornaments made by shoeless, malnourished children in Indonesia.
- We slaughter poor, helpless animals so our illegal little brown maids can fix a lavish meal (those fat noxious gas-emitting cows and hogs have feelings too, you know). No, I meant the pork and beef.
- Santa wears...RED fur. PETA members get cow scrotums in their stockings this Xmas. Keep that under your Halliburton stock certificates, it's a secret.
- Two words. Baby Jesus (Liberals hate Christmas because the unmarried, virginal Mary didn't abort her "clump of cells").
Seriously, how inconvenient can it get -- being a virgin AND pregnant? What was she thinking? It's a simple procedure to them (though it will haunt them the rest of their lives) involving a vacuum and some sort of insertable hammer to crack the skull of the helpless baby.
- Conspicous consumption, or capitalism.
This is commonly known to the left as "materialism" as long as the buyer votes for Republicans. Otherwise it's limousine liberalism and perfectly okay as long as you are A) insane, B)hate George W. Bush, the right's modern saviour and C) think a whore's bath is a perfectly valid alternative to showering.
- And most of all Christmas is a damn good excuse to buy yet another rifle. Liberals piss themselves at the sight of one firearm (yet don't flinch at the sight of a hoover aimed at their cooch), so a collection of things that go BANG...well I'll leave that to your imagination.
But the vast unwashed should buy themselves some depends.
--> please go and give your love to my handsome hubby Tony. Sure he's a liberal, but he's one of the few good ones. And he's a Christian! Maybe we can save him.
Posted by Moxie at December 24, 2004 2:42 AM
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Comments
Ho, Ho, Ho - and that's just to name a couple of the liberals I know.
Ha,ha - have a Merry Christmas you crazy right wing babe!!!
Posted by: Dawn at December 24, 2004 7:30 AM
Mox, what's the world coming to when you and I are enthusiastically encouraging Christmas?
Deep down, it's a rational understanding that our country being Jesusland is the only hope for both real pluralistic religious AND non-religious expression... not just here, but across the planet.
God help us all if the secularists become dominant, because the spiritual vacuum left will suck the jihad in rapidly and you and my daughters will be in jeopardy of a burka'd future.
At this point, I'm fully in favor of the Ann Coulter quote that got her booted from the National Review.
Posted by: Aaron's Rantblog at December 24, 2004 8:35 AM
Really, Moxie, what more could one say, other than:
YOU GO, GIRL!
And of course, a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you.
Posted by: Francis W. Porretto at December 24, 2004 8:35 AM
By the way, you are an insanely good photographer.
Posted by: Aaron's Rantblog at December 24, 2004 8:39 AM
Man, I was starting to think that the Tony Pierce marriage thing was a hoax.......
Rifles? I feel bad for California residents because I'd recommend getting one of these if they were still legal there........
http://www.bushmaster.com/shopping/weapons/bcwa2s20.asp
http://www.bushmaster.com/shopping/weapons/bcwa3f16m4.asp
They would be handy to have during riots to help defend homes and businesses from unwashed looters while the cops are too busy elsewhere to answer your 911 distress calls in a timely manner.
"God help us all if the secularists become dominant, because the spiritual vacuum left will suck the jihad in rapidly and you and my daughters will be in jeopardy of a burka'd future."
If you're in Canada, too late........
http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=35850
http://english.aljazeera.net/NR/exeres/36C85FA4-7C91-4DB5-A259-6A3DD38D1AB7.htm
If you're in Michigan, get out your ear plugs.......
http://www.immigrantsforamerica.com/hamtramck.michigan.city.allows.public.muslim.calls.to.prayer.html
Posted by: reagan80 at December 24, 2004 11:09 AM
My family is going to be opening gifts soon, so I just wanted to wish all my peeps a Merry Christmas and a blesséd New Year. Keep on truckin', my libshit fellow Earthlings.
Posted by: perfectd at December 24, 2004 1:09 PM
Merry Christmas to you and your mox, and all the good folks that visit this site.
Posted by: Jack Hamilton at December 25, 2004 3:02 AM
Merry Christmas everyone.
Posted by: Zelda at December 25, 2004 7:26 PM
Merry Christmas Mox.
Posted by: mlah at December 26, 2004 9:10 PM
Uh, Mox? Cows don't have scrotums. Bulls do.
On that happy note, hope you have a very happy New Year!
Posted by: Omnibus Driver at December 27, 2004 10:11 AM
Merry Christmas, Moxie! Plenty to be thankful for this year, including reading your web site.
Posted by: Outlaw3 at December 27, 2004 10:33 AM
First off, I just found your blog today and love it! The whole Jesusland thing still irks me to no end (I hate the Red-Blue state thing), but I take comfort that my gun-toting ass irks the Left even more! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
Posted by: Doug at December 27, 2004 10:37 AM
Uh, Mox? Cows don't have scrotums. Bulls do.
Obviously, you've never been married.
Posted by: Confederate Yankee at December 27, 2004 11:22 AM
Our prayers and support are with the homeless tsunami victims(intellectuals or not)
Posted by: JK at December 29, 2004 5:50 AM
...uhhh, Mox? Illinois is a blue state and we love Christmas. Even my mainly liberal family (which is--get this--RELIGIOUS!).
Keep reveling in your stereotypes, though. Have fun with them!
Merry Christmas and a happy new year.
Posted by: Bard at December 29, 2004 5:53 PM
