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November 25, 2002

first twins

twentyone.jpgHey Barbara and Jenna, Happy 21st Birthday you crazy kids you!

Sorry that you have to spend your birthday with your folks, I know how you were looking forward to having Tony Pierce show you the ropes, but it's probably for the best. Tony's not much of a drinker, and your Dad has had years of practice.

I'm sure you two are breathing a sigh of relief, recognizing now that you are legal those nasty reporters won't be able to expose your typical college-style underage drinking exploits.

To be honest with you, I really felt bad about all the negative publicity you guys received. You were just being normal kids, afterall. Al Gore's 19 year-old son, Albert Gore III has been arrested for drunken driving twice, most recently a few months ago. It never made the front page, in fact it's hard to find the stories at all.

But what I really wanted to tell you girls is that even if you are legal, you can still get yourselves into a pickle. Really all this birthday means is that you two will have easy access to all the booze your allowances will provide.

That makes either of you two operating a vehicle even more dangerous. And worshipping the porcelin god is not a respectable way for the nation's first children to spend the wee hours of the morning. So you know what I'm saying?

Watch out for pretzels, drink lots of water after a big night and just be careful.

Anyway, I'll pour a glass of champagne tonight and drink it in your honor. And don't forget to send me an email tomorrow and let me know which one of you throws up first.

Cheers!

Posted by Moxie at November 25, 2002 2:00 PM |icon_su.gifStumble It! |85x10-digg-link.gif | del.icio.us

Comments

i wonder if Coors Light will do a commemorative commercial?

I...
Love...
Burritos at 4am...
War with Saddam Again...
And Bush twins!

Hey, I'll admit it. I think Barb twin (not to be confused with Barb mom) is pretty hot.

Posted by: mikey at November 25, 2002 3:48 PM

Tonight they'll drink till their eyes cross! Whoops, too late.

Posted by: Jim Treacher at November 25, 2002 5:57 PM

mmm twins....
er...

Posted by: spike at November 25, 2002 9:07 PM

What's wrong with pretzels???

Posted by: Da Goddess at November 25, 2002 9:34 PM

WOO! THISH ISH JENNA AN - ulp - I WANNA GIVEA SHOUT-OUT TO MY MAIN MOXTHIE! WOO!

- Jenna

Posted by: jenna at November 26, 2002 12:07 AM

You have to watch out for pretzels if you're planning to go on a bender because they're SALTY. (Words from someone who learned the hard way. Hehe) I agree that the Bush twins got tarred with a brush they didn't deserve. They don't know me, and I don't know them, but I wish them all the best!

Posted by: Anne at November 26, 2002 7:43 AM

Bullshit. Gore 3 was ticketed but not arrested for DUI in September, and ticketed but not arrested for speeding in 2000. That's a little different than two arrests for DUI. And a simple google search pulls up articles from all the major dailies on the subject. Liberal bias my ass.

Posted by: RyanA at November 26, 2002 8:25 AM

Gore 3 may not have been arrested for DUI, or DWI, I have no idea what it's called in whatever state he was in, but he was also kicked out of St. Albans, a private school in DC for either selling pot, or smoking it, I forget which. Granted pot isn't a huge deal, but the kids obviously got issues.

Posted by: Bob French at November 26, 2002 8:44 AM

Ryan. I think you ought to read the article Moxie links to more carefully. No frontpage coverage, didn't get covered at all until after 8 days. Not that there was never coverage. Of course you'll find the articles in Google now. But where were the big news outlets when it first happened?

Yeah, I'd say there was a difference between how the twins have been covered and how Gore III's been covered.

Posted by: Greg Hill at November 26, 2002 8:48 AM

I agree that the coverage was different, most likely because 1)the Bush twins are the first daughters, and 2)the Bush confrontations took place in very crowded settings surrounded by tons of fellow drinkers. Much easier to hush up a speeding ticket, to which only driver and officer are witness. My problem is with the dishonesty of the article she cites, which claims he was arrested, which he was not. It also maintains that Chelsea received inordinate media protection. Despite the Clintons' best efforts, one need not spend much time in People Magazine or online to see Chelsea making out or Chelsea drunk. Fans of conservative media ought to recognize the log in their eye before endlessly bemoaning the splinter in that of the Gray Lady.

Posted by: MarkLStone at November 26, 2002 9:07 AM

Not arrested for DUI? Did anyone read the link?! The speeding tickets were a different incident altogether.

I think it's great that we finally see Chelsea drunk. But when she was the twins age, at Stanford, we never heard a thing about her. She's an adult now and I'm sure well equiped to deal with the negative publicity.

Posted by: moxie at November 26, 2002 10:29 AM

Gore 3 . . . obviously got issues.

Wouldn't you, if your dad was a robot geek?

Posted by: Robert Schwartz at November 26, 2002 6:18 PM

I'll give you another reason little Al isn't splashed all over the newspapers, having never seen him I somehow get the the vision of a sullen little preppy slacker with about 3 layers of Abercrombie and Fitch on. This gives you nowhere near the photographic appeal of 2 20 year old minor hotties who just happen to be the presidents little devil daughters. Throw in a little bias, I don't even think Ryan would claim that having a drink at a Mexican restaurant when you're underage ranks up with getting behind the wheel with a load on at any age, but I think it's mostly the hottie factor.

Posted by: Jack Tanner at November 27, 2002 4:51 AM

Hint for Chelsea, Bushx2 and Gore3: Gatorade is great hangover medicine.

Posted by: blamb at November 27, 2002 7:22 AM

I want to see the Bush twins mugshots at the time of their underage drinking arrest?discovery? I think it's only fair since the media is flashing Nick Nolte's mug shot all over the television and newspapers. Hey. Get fair.

Posted by: Dusty at December 12, 2002 5:10 PM

Al Gore III arrested on pot charges. His famous father replied, "Hey, I created Pot."

"Democratic hopeful Howard Dean had planned to deliver a speech last week on foreign policy. It blasted the war effort, President Bush, & our troops utter failure at finding Saddam Hussein. Then, the unthinkable happened. Saddam was captured! Alive! Howard's campaign went into a tizzy. 90% of his speech had to be edited. And it was given a new title..... 'OH SHIT!' If you feel that our troops have been failures - please delete this email. But if you do not believe that - please forward this to everyone you know. "

Posted by: bob at December 22, 2003 3:53 AM